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Armpit Aesthetics

It seems these days antiperspirants do way more than simply keep us smelling fresh and clean.
author   by KIMBERLY RIPLEY  2017
 

It seems these days antiperspirants do way more than simply keep us smelling fresh and clean. They lend themselves to armpit aesthetics. Who knew?

I’ve lived for decades and haven’t once given the state of my armpits the kind of attention they apparently deserve.

Of course I’ve showered daily and shaved said armpits pretty much every day. I use my tried and true antiperspirant deodorant after showering—and on really warm days I usually refresh it on occasion throughout the day.

Alas I have clearly missed the mark in my armpit care—and apparently in my choice of antiperspirants, too. It appears this woman missed it, too, as she was caught tending to her armpits in a public restroom in a most unconventional way.

Dove deodorant claims our armpits deserve way more respect that we’ve been giving them. One of their recent ads shows one woman tenderly caressing her underarms. Another has bedazzled hers with multicolored sparkles. Is this even a thing? The ad also shows the women pre-Dove deodorant abusing their underarms. One woman even plucks hers. Who does that?

And then there’s Degree Dry Spray. Their latest ad claims it works for 48 hours. I take issue with that, and most women I know do, too. Is this product insinuating that we should bathe, apply Degree Dry Spray, and still smell perfectly fabulous after two whole days? Two. Whole. Days?

I know how I’d smell after two days and one spray of deodorant. And surely this is suggesting we don’t bathe during that 48-hour period, as the deodorant would need a second application—right? Even on a rather cool day, sitting at my desk writing my articles, I still feel the need to shower and reapply my deodorant—way sooner than 48 hours.

Alas Degree has a bonus for us, too, ladies. In addition to smelling fine for two days, we can also rub our fingers in our armpits and come away with the ability to snap our fingers. Oh, yes we can! And haven’t you always wanted to do exactly that? I’ve long wished I could snap my fingers after rubbing them in my armpit, but have constantly failed.

Is it not enough to advertise a quality product that keeps our armpits smelling nice and feeling dry? Do armpits really deserve all this attention? How often have you seen a woman walk by and said, “Gee, she’s fit and trim and has a pretty face, but she’s got some heinous armpits?” Or, “I bet she can’t snap her fingers when she puts her deodorant on—but I can!”

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